Naked

Let me start off by saying this will not be a pleasant post. I am disgusted with the way this case has been handled and by the character statements provided to the judge in this rapist’s defense. And yes, that is EXACTLY what he is. A rapist. It doesn’t matter if the rape happened on a college campus or if it happened after someone was abducted.

NO CONSENT = MOTHERFUCKING RAPE

I have had far more conversations about sexual assault, rape culture and rape in the past week than I ever thought I would. To me, this is a GOOD thing. Even when someone is crying victim because they are a poor maligned white male (seriously, I got into a lengthy argument with a British middle aged white male who felt that he was being victimized in the discussion about rape culture – which he insists is a fallacy – because some women falsely accuse men of rape..), the simple fact that a conversation is happening is a huge step in the right direction.

I am 34, going to be 35 later this year. I attended UMass Amherst as a 17 year old Freshman in the fall of 1999. Female students were given an hour long seminar about campus safety where 90% of the discussion was about how to NOT be a victim…oh, and here is your rape whistle! Keep in mind, I attended this wonderful school in the midst of a rash of sexual assaults on campus. Students were livid about the University’s initial response to the events that were unfolding on campus – up to and including RAs being asked to tell us to not alert our parents to an issue on campus.

UMass Amherst Students Fear For Safety

I happen to know FOR A FACT that due to the cold response of Campus Police and faculty, MANY sexual assaults and rapes that Autumn in 1999 went unreported. Women sought out medical treatment, counselling, etc., but did NOT report the crime to the police.

The general feeling on campus among female students was one of “How do I make sure he rapes the other girl?”…a theme that is evident with the anti-rape education most (if not all) women in America receive at some point in their school years. I personally attended 3 separate educational and informational “safety” classes that basically focused on me taking accountability for what I was wearing, what I was eating, what I was drinking, who I spoke to, etc., and gave zero fucks about talking about making sure the males were included and educated about consent. 3 classes. Middle school, high school and college…all feeding us the same line of bullshit.

I have many male friends, and I’ve asked if any of them recall having any consent awareness or rape prevention education, and the answer is a resounding NO.

Now, one could argue that any reasonable and rational human being should understand that consent must be given before sexual activities, but then we have a very public case like Brock Turner. He apparently never got the memo that he was expected to behave like a reasonable and rational human being and not assault and rape someone. In fact, he didn’t even show any remorse!

What’s even more disgusting are the letters written by his father, which you can read here, and by his friend, Leslie Rasmussen. They downplay his actions and responsibility. They build him up to be this model citizen and young man who had the whole world in front of him. But they forget one thing. He raped someone.

Unfortunately for Mr. Turner, his victim, known to us only as Emily Doe, is an eloquent writer. She laid everything out for everyone in heartbreaking detail.

Her words cut to the core. She managed to put into words the unthinkable, and these are words EVERYONE should read. Her words should now be how we start the discussion about sexual assault and rape with young people. Female and male. People need to know what it’s like to have a rape kit done. To be a piece of evidence. To be poked, prodded, photographed, overloaded with information about the morning after pill, prophylactic medication for possible STDs, and the need to follow up in the following months for additional STD screenings.

People need to know how it feels to be victimized repeatedly by medical staff asking questions they need to, by police officers, by attorneys. People need to know that a victim of sexual assault and rape is currently, legally, allowed to have every aspect of their life put on trial.

People need to know that Emily Doe is NOT an anomaly, she is the norm.

People need to know that people like her, people like me, people like your daughters are sick and tired of this. We are ALL Emily Doe, and she speaks for ALL of us.

~ by tatterednotes on June 6, 2016.

Posted in Life, News
Tags: Brock Turner, campus rape, campus sexual assault, consent, Emily Doe, Leslie Rasmussen, rape, rape culture, sex education, sexual assault, Stanford rapist, UMass Amherst, victim shaming